The following is a letter that I wrote to Solomon about a week before he was born. I tucked it away and came across it the other day. After celebrating his first year of life, I think it is fitting to post it now. 

Dear Solomon,

You will be here soon and there are many things that I want to make sure you know, and I don’t want to get caught up with the silly things and ignore what is really important.

The first thing I want you to know about is your name. Solomon was a good king who honored God. He was selfless and thought of others before himself. God granted him wisdom, and continued the succession that led to  Christ. We want you to remember that as you carry that name.  But there is another, much deeper reason why we have decided to call you Solomon.

You have an older brother, Joshua Jr.  He was called to leave this earth before he took a breath. God used him in mighty ways and the Lord was gloried through his very short life. At his funeral, your dad read a passage from the bible, and we put that same verse on his tombstone:

But now he is dead. Why should I fast? Can I bring him back again?

I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.” 2^nd Samuel 12:23

King David said that to his servants after his infant son died. He praised God in the death, and knew that we serve a God whose ways are good. Your dad and I were sad when your brother died, but we also knew that God had a plan. We didn’t know that part of that plan would be you. We were very surprised when we found out you were coming and even more surprised when we found out you would be a boy. Once again, God led us back to His word.  Just like in King David’s life, God brought us joy in the midst of sorrow. The very next verse in that passage shows that after David honored God in the death of his son, God blessed him with another son.

Then David comforted his wife, Bathsheba, and went in to her and lay with her, and she bore a son, and he called his name Solomon. And the LORD loved him 2^nd Samuel 12:24

You were bestowed a strong name with a lot of meaning, carry that with you and know that even your life is ordained. We couldn’t have had you without losing your brother.  Even when things don’t make sense, always know that we serve a perfect God and His ways are good. You are living proof that God's plans never end in heartache!

Probably the hardest thing that I pray for you is that you grow to be a mighty man of God. The reason it is so hard is that I know what that will mean. That means that your life will probably be harder than those around you. You will face trials and hardships that will make you broken and hurt. And as your mother it will hurt me to not protect you from that. One thing that I have learned is that an easy life does nothing for us. Trials are hard, but that is what leads us to cling to God. In those trials we get the best blessings and learn the greatest joys. Each struggle you have will make you a bit stronger, and I pray that God uses each and every instance that he places in your path as a means to draw you to Himself.

I would say that I am sorry you don’t have a big brother to watch out for you through this earthly life, but I am not sorry for that. You have been chosen to carry that role in our family and be the big brother to your future siblings. One day, at the glorious Resurrection, we will bow before a Holy God with a perfect plan and understand it all. Until then, my son, continue to endure. It will be worth it. We are promised that.  

Lastly, and this is the most important thing that I want you to know. Knowing God is all that matters. As your mother I don’t care what you accomplish for this world. I don’t care what possessions you acquire. None of it matters, absolutely none of it. Please don’t get caught up in this world, because it will be over too soon. You dad and I pray every day that God draw you to Himself and save your soul. We pray that more than we pray for your health or physical well-being, and even then we pray that for His glory and not our own. God means more than anything, more than family, more than education, jobs, or money. Knowing Him is all that matters.

Christ took on the punishment we should have when he came to this earth to save us. Even you in my womb will be born in sin. None of us are worthy, but we serve a Holy Savior. Being a child of Him is all that matters.

I pray that I honor God while bringing you up, and it is only by His grace that I do so. I love you so much and am so thankful to be able to witness the life that God has set before you.

Love,

Mama

Back on the Blogging Wagon

I have decided that I am horrible at blogging. Horrible.

I think I have commitment issues. My thirties are going to be my project of follow through. 

Yep, I turned 30.  So far I love it. I feel grown up with still a touch of young, so I am digging that combination. Does anyone remember the song by Deana Carter, “Strawberry Wine?” Well there’s a line in it that goes, “I still remember, when 30 was old….” I was 12 when that song came out, and I remember thinking that 30 was old! YIKES! 

Speaking of which, my father’s 50^th birthday came and went. It was uneventful but really made me reflect. I guess motherhood does that. I was 12 the year my father passed away. He was 32 when he died, and I remember everyone around me exclaiming how young he was. At the time I couldn’t grasp it, but now that I am only 2 years younger than he was when he passed, I am shocked at how young he was.  I am thankful in some ways that I went through something so colossal so young. It really opened my eyes. What followed were some immensely painful years, but looking back, it tethered me to Christ. Up until that point I had no real faith, and that was a huge stepping stone that fixed my path. I wouldn’t take it back.  My eyes were opened to my heavenly father in losing my earthly father.

In other news, Solomon is turning 1! People are asking how I feel and if I am sad. The answer is no, not really. That sounds a little weird to say. God has blessed us with this little person and it amazes me every day how awesome this kid is.  Don’t get me wrong, the baby stage was a blast, but he is so much fun now. He is doing something new everyday, and it is a blessing to watch him learn about the world.While I was pregnant, our prayer was that God would grow Solomon to be a mighty man of God that honors him. Our prayer is still that for him, and God is honoring that prayer every day. Turning 1 is a reminder of how much God has blessed us. Solomon isn’t mine, I know that he is God's, but I am thankful that I have the opportunity to be his mom while on this life. 

Well, yay, I have finished an entry! I am applauding myself right now, and I have a little man who has just woken up and really needs to snuggle. I am taking advantage of these moments while I have them!

365 Days

No I have not fallen off of the face of the earth.


To say the least, things have changed. We were thrown a curve ball.  A big one.


This happened.....

Yep.

About a week after my last post I was shocked to find out that I was pregnant. God led me through one of the scariest but blessed journeys getting this little guy here. My family is proof that God has a plan in all things. We received the devastating news that we lost our precious Joshua Jr. on October 20th, 2011 and 365 days later, on October 19th, 2012 we were blessed with Solomon Hosea!

There were many times that my faith faltered, and we had our share of bumps in the road, but this picture is proof that God is faithful.

I will post much more to follow on the many ways that God has moved in my life, although I am so undeserving of it.

Thank you all who have followed these posts. The countless messages I have received as well as the words of encouragement and prayers mean more than you will ever know. I am one blessed lady!!